Plus One has been my better half since 1998! My dad got a job offer in Colorado my junior year of high school. He didn’t want to make me change schools for one year, so my mom found a way
that I could finish high school in college. So, I went to a community college to finish high school and get college credit. Bonus, I got in state tuition when I went to a normal university.
Spring semester of 1998, I decided to take Anatomy and Physiology. Plus One walked in, and I knew I would marry him. I was dating some other guy at the time. Plus One figured it wasn’t going to happen. I flirted, he was oblivious. I flirted more, he was more oblivious. Finally, we went out on a date, and then I broke up with the other guy. (I told you I was going to hell! I’m not an innocent angel!). That summer, Plus One went off to Philmont Scout Ranch to work as a ranch hand. He had done this the previous 5 years. He called me a couple of times. I wrote him letters. He didn’t respond. I left him messages, he didn’t call back. I was heartbroken.
I went off to college that fall. My roommate let me use her computer, and I saw him online. I IM’d him (we’re old – this was AOL). I just said “It’s Q” except I used my real name. I saw the little dots indicating he was typing for a few minutes. No response appeared on my screen. So, just as I was getting ready to disconnect and cry more, I got “Hi”. Yeah. After months of being ignored and no contact, minutes of him typing, “Hi”. He asked to come up and see me. He didn’t want to talk over IM. I let him.
The first thing I said to him was “You have a lot of explaining to do. Not talking or responding to me for months hurt.” He said “I know, and I’m sorry.” (editors note:I was a schmuck, I admit it) We reconnected. Remember, I’m head over heels in love with him. Lots of ugly family things happened, where I was asked by my mom to make a choice, and I did. They saw how much he hurt me, they didn’t like him. I lied to them about his age, because I knew they wouldn’t like a 17 year old dating a 22 year old. We eventually hammered all of that out.
We did the long-distance thing the rest of that year. I stayed at my parents house that summer. He proposed. I said yes. I went off to college that fall, and he paid for my apartment (still family issues). I was probably depressed, and stopped going to school. I moved down with him. I got a job as a bank teller. He worked graves for a police department as a dispatcher. We planned a wedding. We got married. We bought a house. I went back to school. His mom caused major major problems. He supported her and told me to suck it up. I was finishing school, and decided I was done with is mother. I told him that I was moving to the other side of the state, he could follow me or we could end the marriage. He followed me, but made sure to run me over with a bus when telling his family. This caused further problems with me and his “mother’s” side of the family. I passed my CPA exam. He finished college. He got a new job on the other side of the state (we both wanted this), and we moved back down. We had a baby. Things came to a big head with his “mother”, and we eventually cut her off. I’ll explain all of her glory later.
He saw the error in how he was treating me, and expecting me to suck up everything to make sure his “mother” was happy. Our marriage improved. We had another baby. It improved more. I almost died. We both saw how much we meant to the other. We’re recommitting to each other next year at our 15th wedding anniversary. We moved from Colorado to Texas.
He’s put up with so much from me. I know a lot of bad happened in our relationship, but he’s my rock. He supported me when no one else did. He was willing to walk away from me completely so I didn’t lose my family. I knew then that he was a good man – he was willing to lose me just so I didn’t lose my biological family. He’s helping me find out who I am. He’s been so patient with my ongoing depression (no longer just PPD), my mood swings, my lack of desire to do anything. He listens to my needs and helps meet them. He tells me his needs, and I help meet them. He is my best friend, my better half, my soul mate. I would be lost without him. We both give 100% to the marriage.